BOOM'S HINTS FOR ROOKIE TEACHERS Ah, you poor first year teacher... They probably didn't tell you about these things in Ed School, so here's real life in teaching: You're on trial this year. The kids will be testing you to see how much they can get away with. Thirty-five years ago, "The Boom" was a rookie, and if someone had given him the following advice, his first year would have been a thousand times better. If you're stuck with "low-ability" classes, which rookies usually are, you will really need this. But college prep kids try stuff too, especially the Seniors in the springtime. Here are typical things they will try: "May I go to the bathroom? I really gotta go, too!" (Some even jump up and down with hand in crotch. Well, things are a bit different in California). Your answer... "NO POTTY CALLS." (And no further discussion, either). (They're big kids now, and they have breaks for the lav). It is rare that there is a serious reason to go. They just want out for a walk or to visit (especially after an exam). Administrators don't like kids in the halls even with passes. It looks bad for the new teacher-- conned again. NO trips to the drinking fountain either! NEVER go over exams in class! The rookie thinks that this would be a good learning experience. WRONG! The kids don't give a darn about going over the thing, they only want to argue about points and waste a period giving you a bad time. You will lose the class since the others don't care about the person who is currently giving you the bad time and will start private conversations. Never try to justify anything such as, "Why do I need this dumb class, I'm not going to be a ..." Just tell 'em to get busy or lie down on the counselor's couch and check out. Again, they're just trying to egg you on. Tell them what to do, don't try to justify it. NEVER discuss an individual student's grades or exam complaints IN CLASS or BETWEEN periods! You lose the rest of the class while this is happening or your precious between-class time is lost. Your standard command should be, "See me after school". You will find that only the most serious student will give up his OWN time to argue about anything. This will eliminate 95% of the arguments about grades or exam point squeezing attempts. Never return papers before the LAST MINUTE of the class period! If you return them at the beginning or during class, the kids' attention will spent on searching for points to argue about and comparing their papers with others' to see if you were inconsistent in grading. "Why didn't you take off points on her answer?" Hand them back as they are leaving so that they don't have time to compare papers and start arguing. Remember, "See me after school if you have questions or complaints." NEVER tolerate anyone getting out of his seat while you are lecturing or showing a film. Some will get up and go to the pencil sharpener or to the waste basket. These interruptions are a nuisance. NEVER argue with the kids. They know that adults are out-of-date, irrelevant, stupid ignoramuses, so just laugh and continue. They love to waste as much class time as they can by arguing, and you will not convince them of anything anyhow. NEVER allow students to "go to their lockers" to get something they "forgot". Like the potty calls, it's just an excuse to take a walk. If they didn't bring any of the required materials, give them an appropriate punishment but don't let them go. Be sure to let them know the punishments in advance. You must be consistent with everyone. Always start the class ON TIME! The kids should know that when the bell rings class starts! If you mess around or talk to individuals so that there is not a regular starting moment, the kids will be doing their own visiting and it's hard to get them started. See the Boom's Daily Bonus idea for a worth while two or three minute activity to occupy them while you take roll and do the other administrative chores. You want them ON TASK when that bell rings. Hand out a Course Information Sheet on the first day, go over it once, and tell them that THEY are responsible for its rules and policies. See the Boom's for an example. When a problem comes up concerning policies for your class, it will be in writing! Some teachers make the kids sign a copy which they keep on file. Have a time-limit policy for make-up work where it must be done quickly, like within a day or two. Otherwise you will get stuck grading stacks of papers many centimeters tall at the end of the grading period while you are swamped with grade preparations. To eliminate the grade hassle, contact "The Boom" about a spectacularly great computer gradebook program.* Allow no make-ups for unexcused absences! Watch out for this trick, "Boom, I DID this assignment, here it is in the return basket, you forgot to grade it." Yeah, it just got stuck there good and late and, no doubt, copied from someone else's work. Be strict about tardies. Demand promptness. See the Boom's "Congratulations..." summons for tardies and other disciplinary problems. Prepare your seating charts IN ADVANCE. When the kids walk in, TELL them where they are to sit.. Never let them choose their own seats. This gives you talking and cheating groups. (I haven't had a problem letting them choose their own lab partners, but I assign their lecture seats. Talking is not a problem in labs and they don't take tests at their lab stations). Contact The Boom for a spectacular shareware computer program for making versatile and beautiful seating charts that can be randomized on command, and you can switch kids with the mouse.* Don't tolerate wise cracks. Funny as some are, they multiply until you lose the class. Never get mad. For most problems, just laughing will ease the tension and will eliminate hard feelings. "Heh, Heh, Mike, consider this detention a blessing in disguise, ha, ha, think of how much homework you'll get done..." "Oh, Bertha, it's your second cut, heh, heh, well I understand that Saturday School is the breakfast club where you'll meet new friends...har, har." Be firm but fair. They can't complain about that. Science teachers really have it made because we have so many activities to "entertain" the kids. They love demos and labs. Great films and videos are available, too. With the latter, you should make comments during the showing to "keep it alive" and part of your teaching. Call The Boom about a super great shareware computer program for randomly calling upon kids (big print on the screen) for class reviews, group selecting, cooperative learning stuff, etc.* When a kid asks, "When do we get out of here?" you respond, "WRONG! It's, "When MUST we leave?" Your attitude is most important! Be positive and firm. Have a good time. Laugh off as much as possible. Be nutty! A successful teacher is an entertainer, not a dull, ultra serious lecturer. Much learning takes place when all are having fun. Even after 35 years, The Boom still loves teaching and will retire when his corpse collapses onto the demo table. Good Luck, Have Fun! ---------------------------------------------------------------- THE DAILY BONUS INTRODUCTION: Five years ago, one of my colleagues came up with this idea which is so successful that our entire science department is using it. Other teachers are also using it, and administrators rave about it. Wow! We all have our own names for it such as "Daily Bonus, First Thing, Point of the Day". HERE'S HOW IT WORKS: Before class starts, the teacher jots a review question or problem on the board, which is designed to take the kids two to five minutes to answer. It is open book and notes so that all can do it. As the students enter, they immediately sit down, take a half-sheet of paper, and go to work on the question or problem while the teacher is taking role and doing the other pre-class paper work. When the teacher is done, he has the kids zip in their half-sheets. Class is now ready to start with the kids all quiet and ready to go. WHAT THIS HAS ACCOMPLISHED: --The kids are arriving ON TIME because they lose this point if they are tardy. --The kids are SITTING DOWN and GOING TO WORK instead of talking and making a ruckus during roll. --No time is being wasted. --The teacher can relax and do his roll in a quiet classroom. --The student can improve his grade. --The students are LEARNING as they write their bonus instead of wasting time. --The teacher has a couple of extra minutes to finish setting up a demo or lab while the kids are busy (make the bonus longer if you need extra minutes). --The teacher gets big brownie points on his administrative evaluation. (In our school, one is penalized if he wastes so much as a minute of class time!) HOW IT IS GRADED: Ah, here is a very nice thing. The teacher spends only a couple of minutes per class (or no time if he has a TA to do it instead). Because it is extra credit, you need not grade it carefully. Just skim through it, and if the kid has made a decent attempt, mark a tally on a class roster (not in your roll book or computer). The kids don't want these back, so you don't even need to mark their papers, just chuck 'em. At the end of the grading period, sum up the tally marks and make a single entry into your gradebook for extra credit. OTHER BENEFIT: Because these bonus points are extra credit, it is legal to dock kids if you want to penalize them for anything, like say tardies. ----------------------------------------------------------------- Sample Course Info Sheet: BIG CHEM-- COURSE INFORMATION SHEET COURSE DESCRIPTION: Big Chem is the study of the great reactions and principles outlined in the contents of the text along with the magnificent Semi-Micro Qualitative Analysis. GOALS: The students will write explanations, perform labs, and solve problems on the above topics. A NOTEBOOK IS REQUIRED: It must be BOUND (spiral recommended) and kept in INK! Print your name in large lettering on the front cover and initial each page. ASSIGNMENT POLICY-- NOW GET THIS AND GET IT WELL! LATE ASSIGNMENTS WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED-- DEFINITION OF LATE : 1-- Not in at BEGINNING OF PERIOD. 2-- Not in within ONE day after return from ILLNESS. 3-- Not delivered on DUE DATE for NON-ILLNESS excused absence. (For example, field trip or athletics). Bring it in BEFORE SCHOOL or send it in by SPECIAL COURIER! EXAMS missed with excused absences must be made up at lunch on the day you return to school! BE SURE TO SAVE YOUR RETURNED PAPERS in case you ever have to prove you did them. WARNING: Vacations are UNEXCUSED ABSENCES. You will not be allowed to make up work missed during vacations taken on school time! GRADING: Your grade is determined by the system whereby 90% = A, 80% = B, 70% = C, 60% = D. A BONUS POINT is given for an exercise completed while the roll is being taken. Five bonus points are deducted for each tardy. CLASS RULES: You must ATTEND REGULARLY and BE ON TIME! Tardiness will not be tolerated! You will lose 5 bonus points for each tardy and get detention on the third tardy. You must BRING TO CLASS each day your TEXT, NOTEBOOK, and TWO PENS. ASSIGNMENTS: All assignments must be done in INK and turned in AT THE BEGINNING OF THE PERIOD. LABORATORY EXPERIMENTS must include OBSERVATIONS, the QUESTIONS and a CRITIQUE. HEAD YOUR PAPER THUS: ........................................................................... ........................................................................... BIG CHEM NAME______________ DATE____________ PERIOD______________ ASSIGN _____________ BIG CHEM IS GREAT! HAVE FUN! ----------------------------------------------------------------- CONFERENCE SUMMONS Administrators frown on teachers who send kids to the office too much. If you are having a problem with a kid, try handling it yourself. The 15- minute after school "conference" is usually enough punishment for most crimes like disruptiveness, tardies, etc. Hand the "CONGRATULATIONS" to the offender and say no more. This way it will not be a major break in your lesson. The reason for 15 minutes is that it doesn't inconvenience you very much, and short detentions don't require advanced notice. You attack the problem while it is still hot and before the kid returns to class. If the character doesn't show up, have his referral to the office filled out and present it to him as he walks in the next day. Again, you will not interrupt the lesson. This way the administration knows that you tried to handle the problem yourself. In most cases the kids will show up for the "lesser punishment". Make this up in your word processor in large bold print that looks very "Official". -------------------------------------------------------------------- CONGRATULATIONS You have just acquired a mandatory 15-minute conference in this room at 2:45 TODAY! Should you choose not to appear, you will receive a referral to the Vice Principal for the issuance of a one-hour detention or possibly a Saturday School. BE HERE AND SIN NO MORE! ------------------------------------------------------------------- Submitted by Preston "The Boom" Boome